Lake of silence

"Lake of Silence" began with a simple reflection from a bowl of water on my kitchen wall, reminding me of the anxiety I feel when speaking among native English speakers. This anxiety, akin to the English expression "butterflies in the stomach," is called ‘Tooye Delam Ashoob Mishe’ in Farsi, meaning “There is a hurricane in my stomach.” The blurry, fast-moving shapes in the reflection mirrored the discomfort and hesitation I experience in social situations, where the decision to speak or remain silent causes immense dread.

The piece explores the internal struggle of migrants who face anxiety over whether to speak or remain silent in public. Language barriers often lead to insecurity and fear of judgment, making many immigrants hesitant to express themselves, fearing mistakes or cultural misunderstandings.

"Lake of Silence" features a projected video, a sound recording of my voice, and a metal screen with the phrase ‘Look Beyond’ suspended in front of the screen. Displayed in a dark room, the projection shows constantly changing black and white images, reflecting the fluctuating speed and direction of the water’s movement. Accompanying this visual is my voice in Farsi, repeating “Begaam, Nagaam” (Should I talk? Should I stay silent?), with the tone of my voice shifting to convey my nervousness when contemplating speaking out loud.

Although most of my audience might not understand Farsi, the rising urgency and falling tone of my voice communicates the anxiety. The metal screen with ‘Look Beyond’ creates a shiny effect, symbolizing the seemingly calm surface of a silent person, while inviting viewers to see the turmoil beneath. The mesh screen, both transparent and a barrier, represents the gap between the silent migrant and the audience. By looking beyond the surface, viewers are encouraged to understand the silent struggle, challenging them to see beyond silence as mere agreement and to acknowledge the migrant’s experience.